It’s not just one particular profile that makes a good man, but a combination of characteristics. Men’s Leadership Mentor, Dean Brown, shares some essential ingredients for helping men step into their personal power, claim their leadership role, and develop fulfilling relationships, both business and personal.
A recent conversation with a friend made me aware that men are more hungry than ever for leadership mentoring. Continually shifting and uncertain times have left you unsure of where you stand in the world of business and personal relationships with women and how you can best lead others.
Dean Brown mentored thousands of people in his life and I thought it would be helpful to share a conversation I recorded with him during a Men’s Leadership Mastermind.
Dean is my father and he passed on last year. He still has much wisdom to share through videos and audio recordings, though. He not only mentored and guided many men in their roles as leaders, he was also responsible for saving the lives of more than a few. I think you’ll enjoy hearing the insights of a man who was highly successful as a business owner and entrepreneur, as a husband and father, and as a spiritual mentor. The fact that his wife of 51 years adored him and his daughters considered him their best friend says a lot about his ability to honor women and to lift them up in ways that only a strong, confident, and secure man can do. Guys, take notes!
4:48 – Leaders are willing to step into the unknown, bringing their whole selves along for the ride. The dance of masculine/feminine energies is always at work – yin/yang. There’s not such thing as “just business”. People do business, so that makes everything personal. Two sides to the same coin.
6:15 – Men’s leadership is particularly important at this time because as many women step into leadership roles, we need men to stand in their masculine energy to ground our changing world. Masculine power is a gift, not a competitive power to the feminine. Together, we make an integrated whole. Dean was a powerful mentor and example of men’s leadership at its best because he was a masculine man with the ability to share his compassion and his love with everyone around him. He understood that his receptive skills were equally important to his skills and his success as a proactive leader.
10:53 – Dean shares some stories of life-changing events that propelled him into his role as a public speaker, leader and mentor.
14:05 – As a young professional, Dean was approached to lead a group of teens and was initially reluctant, but he recognized that he had a responsibility to step up as a leader. It led him to a love of inspirational and motivational speaking that became a lifelong passion.
Try not to become a person of success, but rather try to become a person of value.Albert Einstein
17:00 – Dean talks about the importance of developing listening skills in order to become more successful in business. He describes the need, from his experience working with a crisis center, to be discerning with people who pull you down with unrelenting talk about their problems. You have to learn how to know when to engage in deep listening.
19:15 – Men can have a hard time listening to women. Dean describes some of the reasons for this and why, in helping others to step into men’s leadership roles, he considers it vital to master your mindset in this area if you want to be successful in your business and personal relationships.
21:15 – We have many different personality styles and ways of approaching things. We may need to examine our views of the other gender to recognize men and women have equal value as human beings. Our roles have changed drastically since our origins of man as hunter/gatherer and woman as nurturer, so it stands to reason that when we try to communicate, we’re often not talking about the same thing.
22:10 – SONG: “Something Left Unsaid”
This is one from the archives of Frankly Scarlet, the duo I shared with my sister, Kelly Brown. From the album, Oh, Yeah. Get it on ITunes.
25:56 – Dean talks about using listening skills to best understand how to guide business conversations. When you are the leader, you want to make sure you stay in the position of steering the conversation. Losing control of that can mean loss of a business deal. Listening skills are vital for anyone to master, but especially in men’s leadership positions, because men can be challenged to stay focused and listen well to overly chatty women. (Dean is clear that it’s not just women who can meander in conversations and chatter about minutiae!)
28:15 – Preparing for business meetings by knowing something about the person you’ll be meeting can help you stay on point and keep your conversation going in the direction you want it to go. Dean gives tips for developing your intuitive skills (closely connected to listening skills) for steering the conversation.
29:10 – People often see intuitive skills as being more feminine, but male leaders have long been known to use intuitive skills to guide their “tribes”, heal their patients, invent, innovate, create, and take care of the Earth.
30:51 – Dean shares two stories about his own intuition and the profound impact it had on him. One instance, when he heeded his intuition, changed his life and made him more keenly aware of the pain of others. It also saved another man’s life. The other instance, in which he ignored his intuition, resulted in the loss of a cherished friendship.
35:42 – Dean encourages men to “listen to your intuition”. We have the DNA of God, regardless of what you want to call that higher power. It’s in our makeup to know things beyond our mental capacity. We don’t know exactly what to call it, but we need to learn to pay attention to it and act on it.
37:44 – Dean examines the fear men have about opening up to the power of the unknown. It can appear to be a weakness for them to open up to intuition, emotion, and spirituality. Dean was in the military and understands the mindset of needing to appear to have a impenetrable armor. He considers it a strength that Roger Staubach could stand up at Texas Stadium and shed tears as he expressed his love for and sadness over the loss of Tom Landry. It’s important for men in leadership positions to show other men that it’s okay to show emotion. Dean believes men have held themselves back by not showing this part of themselves.
39:15 – We won’t ever completely get over our fears, but part of men’s leadership and becoming a successful person and a person of value means you must discontinue to have fears about who you are and your own worth. Learn to be tender with your wife and your children. Show your loving side and not always your authoritative side.
39:55 – Dean shares the story of the change in his father when Dean was drafted for war. It melted his father’s heart to a point that he became a more tender person throughout the rest of his life. His father was also touched by the tenderness and excellence of a black man to the point that it melted away the racism that had been handed down to his father by his grandfather.
41:15 – Men don’t want to appear weak, especially to other men. You may be holding yourself back because of this fear. Indulging this fear prevents you from being the man you’re meant to be.
41:53 – In order for men to step into real leadership and women to step into theirs, we need men to open themselves to their tenderness. We all understand the masculine warrior, but as long as men sit in that role, there has to be an enemy. When a man opens himself up to his more receptive side – yes, he might get hurt – but he also might find peace. We’re waiting on men’s leadership to open to the more tender side. The world will look very different when that happens.
45:49 – SONG: “Hippo-Hoppo” – a little ditty from Dean Brown, a man who brought much tenderness, joy and laughter to everyone around him.
More from Dean Brown
• FREE intro video to “Share Your Story, Sing Your Song” – Dean’s online course for helping you to become who you’re meant to be as a leader and as a person of value.
• Dean’s final talk to a group that asked him to share some of his life story. See the free video here
More from Kimberly
• Rhythmic Movement Meditations – Music is scientifically proven to provide health benefits in every area of life. Use these tools to help you connect with your highest state of excellence & primal essence, so you can shift your energy for greater clarity, courage, focus, & vitality. A potent combination of your sexual energy combined with your spiritual energy. GET THESE POWERFUL MOVEMENT MEDITATIONS NOW! & experience it for yourself. Listen to this attorney talk about his experience of finding a new position as a corporate VP when he used these meditations.
• Please understand this is not a claim that you will have the same or similar experiences. Rhythmic Movement Meditations are simply tools to help you learn to shift your own energy through powerful practice.
• The Naked Vibes Show is sponsored by RockItU – Get a Free Video to help you hone your intuitive skills for practical use in everyday life.